I have been around a while, sometimes I feel like it’s been too long. I have seen things I cannot un-see and lost more than I can even remember. I thought so many times I had finally had my hands around the brass ring only to realize it was nothing but a wish.
I had given up. I had stopped hoping. I had stopped even wishing. I had succumbed to the fear that I did not deserve anything truly good or meaningful in this life.
Then I met a bear. I thought I had met some beautiful and fascinating women in my time, after all I had worked in show business, but I was not prepared for her.
She was everything I had ever dreamed of but long ago stopped hoping for. Smart, fascinating, funny, creative, passionate, emotional, caring, giving, mysterious and you will note I hadn’t even mentioned that she was exactly my type physically. Come to find out we share so much.
These have been those amazing and trying times I have ever had. The distance is agonizing sometimes and I get scared I will not be able to survive it…but then I see her face. My fears and insecurities fade and I can picture us together.
I have never been so in love. I never believed I deserved to love this much or be this loved. I won’t lie, sometimes the dark still gets me and I find myself sucked in to the pain and agony that is my own psyche but she keeps me present. I don’t fall as deep nor as long and I can still see the light.
I love her, I am in love with her. I need her and want her more every day.
Have hope. If it can happen for an old, grumpy bear who has done everything possible to make sure I don’t deserve it, then it WILL happen for you. The pain you feel know will feel like a debt that needed to be paid to get here.
He fills me with so much love. I can feel it in my heart, busting to get out and be expressed. It’s alive, so truly alive. It’s like atoms buzzing around, bouncing against my ribcage in their haste. It’s divine and warm, and sometimes it’s gentle but usually it’s not. I have to move in order to…
I am, by far the most fortunate bear ever to walk the earth. Even ha I the skill of a poet and the knowledge of a professor I would not have been better able to explain how I feel about you and how I feel about us. There is nothing I can add except thank you my darling beargirl for loving me.
I thought about my true love, the one I really need With eyes that burn so bright, they make me pure They make me pure They make me pure I long to be with you
Maybe I knew the day I realized even the simplest, most mundane activities become wonderful when he’s around. Maybe I knew the…
I did not write this. But this this fucking this. People ask ‘how do you know’, and I don’t know what to tell them apart from, “You just know.” And I want to tell them that if they don’t just know, then it’s not right, but that wouldn’t be fair… they may be happy enough. Some people never feel like this. I don’t know… I never thought I could. I thought, at best, I could be ‘happy enough’ with someone… nothing wrong. But I never dreamt that every little part of me could feel so fulfilled. Thank you for posting this. I wish that everybody in the world gets to feel this way.